Geometry has scared the bejeezus out of me since I was a small child.
I just don’t get it.
Sure, I can identify your basic shapes, but anything more than that sends shivers down my spine.
While most children worried about a monster in their closet, I feared there was an isosceles triangle lurking beneath my bed, daring me to find its perimeter.
In fourth grade, trapezoids and rhombuses began stalking me. Not only was I expected to identify these rectangular misfits, I needed to calculate their area.
Don’t get me started on angles.
“You’re going to want to find the missing angle of this quadrilateral,” some teacher said.
Who says the angle wants to be found?
Maybe it’s missing for a reason.
A few years ago, I decided to return to work as a substitute teacher. To my horror, geometry was still being taught.
Where’s Cancel Culture when you need it?
Teaching a class of fifth graders, I discovered I was expected to present a lesson on the three types of triangles. “Well, there’s small and medium, and don’t forget about big!” I told the class.
Nailed it!
The next time I had to teach geometry, it involved finding circumferences and multiplying radiuses.
That’s when I started hyperventilating and quickly scanned the room for Super Smarty Pants.
Super Smarty Pants is that student who knows everything about everything.
I LOVE Super Smarty Pants.
I sat back and watched as Super Smarty Pants taught us how to find the circumference of a circle.
I elbowed the student next to me. “He’s good.”
Then, I took a deep breath and relaxed.
I guess I can stop worrying.
Except…
What if I show up one day and I have to teach geometry, and Super Smarty Pants is absent? And all the other kids are just like me, missing the geometry chunk of their brain? And they all stare at me, asking me how to find the volume of a cylinder, as I break out in hives.
You see why I may have to pull the fire alarm.
Check out: “Irrational Fears: Part 3“ coming Monday
Haahaa! This is a rational fear!! I may pull the fire alarm for you😉
I agree with Lisa. Totally rational fear. Mr. Marshall was my geometry teacher, and the fact I still remember his name speaks to the significance of the trauma.
I share your fear of geometry, January! Actually, it’s more of a generalized fear of math. Solidarity! ✊😂❤️
I feel your pain. Luckily my adult life involving any type of math has only been making correct addition to double a recipe. Add me to the list of no geometry adults you know. Keep us laughing!!
I feel the same way about geometry! Love the story!
On triangles.. Small, medium, and big… what else do you need to know, really? 😂
Nicely done! Looking forward to part 3:)
I love how you found a creative solution by embracing Smarty Pants! Now what can he do about alligators?
Irrational fears – how’s Hiccups for something ridiculous?
I can assure you, a fear of geometry is perfectly rational! And, as a fellow substitute teacher, I can also assure you that there’s more than one Smarty Pants per class, so you’re golden. 😉
It scares the bejeezus out of me too! And I wish you a room full of Smarty Pants!
I’m right with you in this fear!! Geometry was my nemesis! Thanks for another fun and funny fear story!