January Gordon

Hold the Mold!

We recently learned that our friend’s daughter-in-law, Becca, gets up at the crack of dawn every morning to make her husband a delicious breakfast. Rumor has it, not only is she whipping up eggs at this ungodly hour, she’s doing it in an adorable outfit, fresh make-up, and with a cheery attitude. Diabolical.  I turned

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Glammogram

This past week, I had a dentist appointment, a gynecological exam, and today, a mammogram.  I don’t need to tell you about the dentist since I’ve already written about that (See: Perfectly Respectable Chompers). In a nutshell, I made promises I couldn’t keep (flossing) and then Dr. B punished me with scary tools. The gynecological

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Miracle

When I first walked into the building, ominous music played as if I were entering a horror film. Like Clarice, I could hear the lambs screaming. BAAAAHH! Wait, no, that was me. “Can I help you?” Brittany, the sales clerk, asked. It would help if I were 30 years younger and 10 pounds lighter, but

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